Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Hello Newcomers, and Homework Part 1

My friend Moneydummy linked my blog on her blog. Which means that there are now people actually reading this blog. o.O So, um, welcome, visitors! And thank you for your kind comments.

Today's post is part one of my therapy homework mentioned in the previous post. I tried answering the first two questions, but didn't get anywhere. Instead, I kept getting ideas for the third question, so I'm answering it first.

Question: How can I learn to be less emotionally reactive? When am I more emotionally reactive, and how can I decrease those times?

Answer: I am less emotionally reactive (aka calm, content, capable of functioning without biting peoples' heads off) when:

- I have had enough sleep
- I have eaten (stable blood sugar)
- I have exercised
- I am in a clean environment
- I am not overwhelmed by noise/kids wanting attention/things to do/etc.
- I feel I have accomplished something / have made progress towards goals, especially long-term goals
- my kids and husband are calm/happy
- I am alone
- I have had alone-time to de-stress
- I feel I am doing a good job
- I am outside (and it's warm)
- When my husband is home

I'm not sure this list is complete, but it's what I've got.

I can increase the time I am calm by:
- eating, sleeping, and exercising regularly
- getting regular breaks from kids
- tidy the house every day
- learn to meditate (I don't really know how to do that, but it's supposed to be helpful)
- keeping a journal of accomplishments and goal tracking so I can have visual proof that I'm not just spinning my wheels
- taking heavy-duty parenting classes or something.
- getting off the computer when people start fighting me for it?

If anybody's got suggestions, you're welcome to post them.


Lem said...

Hi Jessicat,
Thanks for inviting me to your blog.

I can certainly relate to lots of the things you've written about so far. I read a book a couple years ago that really helped me during one of my low points. It's called "Guilt-free Motherhood" and it was written by a woman who is a psychiatrist and also religious so it really blends the two topics, which I really liked. You might try it. I would loan it to you, but I haven't gotten my two copies back from the people I loaned them to last. (you see, it's a very common problem). Motherhood can be extremely lonely in our current culture.

RTC said...

Hi Cat,
I found your blog through MoneyDummy's. I am going to counseling and recovering from codependency. Sometimes I work hard at dealing with my issues, but sometimes I tend to avoid them.
I really like your analysis of what you can do. I just want to encourage you to continue to take care of yourself. If some days you fall down, that's OK. Do-overs are allowed.
I think your notebook and your blog will be an encouragement for you.